Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Not a bit wiser!!!




It was my birth day few days ago...


A new milestone..


Three decades on planet Earth ,good to know i actually survived this long.


No ,i didn' expect the world to stop revolving ,and sure enough i didn't expect to see the news on the 6 o'clock news..Actually ,i spent my day and night at work,the usual fun night shift..


Looking back into my life ,i realize that i had so many things to think about ,except for my birth ,which i really had no thing to do with ,if you have any objecions ,call my parents..


Seriously ,I start to think about every thing ..


I went through interesting stages..And what strikes more was the fact that i'm actually still evolving...into what?i really don't know!!!!


I was the quite kid ,whose every boy in the class hated because he was the teacher's favorite...


I was the boy scout who loved he nature ,but didn't like to mix with others a lot..


I also was the boy who likes to read about dinasaurs ,and dream about being an astronaut..


I survived my teen age years with few ,or non ,acne scars ,and thank God ,there was no smoking or drugs issues during that...


I was even an idealist for a while ,and that was really stressing ,so i gave up idealism and became more practical ,but in a good way(I hope!)...


I had my share of the heart breaks .


I had my dreams ,my night mares ,my demons..


I had people i loved ,and ohers i hated..


After three decades ,i realized that i'm very much the same..and not the same a all..


I realized that there is a difference between what i am ,and what i want to be ,but i am the result of both..


I have great friends ,whose support and encourgement helped me hrough the darkest moments ,even though they lead their lives thousands of miles away.


But above i all ,I have a great Mother ,whose devotion and love was the real light house ,that guided me through it all


Whose smile and care is like no thing else..


So ,did i talk too much about some thing that only matters to me?? well,,it is really not my fault..

You know me well enough by now to realize that i am not that quite kid any more...Perhapse it is jus that i like the voice of my own thoughts..


So,what else did i realize on my birh day??

I realized that i'm still making the same mistakes ,saying the same things ,having the same dreams
I realized that now i am one year older..

and not a bit wiser..


Till next time..


My best regards






23 comments:

PH said...

Well Happy Birthday :) wa 3a3'bal 100 sana :D.

salaam

Anonymous said...

I have always thought Birthdays should be "mothers Day", a day to celebrate the woman who went through the pain and fear to bring you into this world! I realize the special day for each of us is celebrated in many different ways all over this big blue marble! Some in grand fashion and others go un-noticed. Heres to you wise friend. The healer of boo boo's! Although your special days has gone by........ take a day, anyday and pamper yourself! Play in the rain, call an old friend, eat something very wrong (JUNK FOOD)!!!!! Just look in the mirror and say I MADE IT THIS FAR! Besides who knows what next year will bring! Thoughts from your Michigan fan! K.H P.S Still hate me???????????

Anglo-Libyan said...

happy birthday

the best is still to come inshaAllah :o)

abdullah SH said...

Happy-b-day bro wish all ur dreams comes true ... Now ur life counter decrease one yr ... 3o2bal el 3omr kelo .

enlightened spirit said...

sorry my friend for this long comment but I really adore ur meditative writing , and it just took my mind along with it, to meditate for a while.

"It was my birh day few days ago..."
ذكرى ميلاد سعيدةولو كانت في أروقة وسراديب المستشفيات فهذا كما يبدو قدرا كتب علينا.

"if you have any objecions ,call my parents"
I have; give me their numbers ... loool ;)

"i'm actually sill evolving...into wha?i really don't know!!!!"
don't worry coz no one can know, it is the path drawn by Allah for each of us, we just have to go in the way till the end, and deal with each obstacle as an exam for the strength our faith.

"I was the quite kid ,whose every boy in he class haed because he was he eacher's favorie..."
same here :)

"and dream abou being an astronaut.."
that was my ultimate interest, and unfortunately unaccomplished wish !!!

"I had my share of the heart breaks"
there is alot of causes which can broke our hearts, if I comment about losing a loved partner...I think by this age we should either be happily married or have our share of heart breaks, (or we wouldn't be a normal human being)... I wish if I can know the wisdom of going through these bad experiences before I leave this life.
who can decide if I am normal???

"they lead their lives thousands of miles away."
losing friends is one of the heart breaks ...but we can always make other friends... then u r also leading a great life here, u help in making a difference each day in ur own people's life, beside u r making ur mom happy just by being around her, and that's a huge achievement although most of us loss the sense of it by daily life routine; great that u didn't lost that sense.

"did i talk to much abou some thing that only matters to me??"
okey, is my long comment enough to prove to u that it is not only matters to u.
creative writing touch all those who come accross it.

"it is jus that i like the voice of my own thoughts.."
an excellent sign of self-content, and healthy well-being.

"I realized that now i am one year older..
and no a bit wiser.."

well if this wisdom which all the readers touch from ur posts and comments, is not a result of years of life experience, then u will definitely have an anwesr to this question: are the years leaving or coming ???

P.S: what the hell happen to the T letter in ur post ???!

ibeebarbie said...

Salam Benghazi Citizen,
Happy belated birthday! May Allah bless you always. May your dreams and desires come true for honestly you are a magnificent individual. Thank you for opening your heart to us to once again give us a glimpse inside of you. Can you imagine how wonderful that would be if we all did that more often? What a dynamic world it would be that we lived in.

There's an absolute charm about you which is so endearing, which I believe has to do with the fact that you make yourself vulnerable to us by sharing your thoughts. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Blessings to your mom, for she has raised a special son, a real man.

حنان شلبي said...

كل سنة وانت طيب والعمر كلو يارب

ولا تفكر بلي مر عليك لانو تلات ارباع الكرة الراضية بسير معهم زيك

بس ان شاء الله الي جاي عليك بحياتك الجديدة رح بيكون مميز وحلو كتير

تحياتي الك

WEDA said...

hay dr happy birthday.........ur mom must be a wonderful lady that she made a real man like you...really as i know a little but reallly i'm enjoying my time with u allll my new friends.....thax 4 being my friend.......by the way .i'm a leo just like u

Khalid said...

Happy belated Birthday, dear BC.
Wish you a very bright, twinkling, successful upcoming year in your life
Enjoy it to the MAX.

:)

Gheriani said...

Happy Birthday dear BC, and my best wishes that your dreams may come true.

CrowdedMind said...

Happy Birthday
waa so fast
months ago I posted a wrong comment about your birthday

Happy Birthday Dr

Fe aman Allah

dusk till dawn said...

salam bro
great happy birth day wish cross the miles , hope more happy years to come , iam sure ur wiser and thoughtful then last year, and all ur wishes and dreams comes true ,u got great mom and family thats the strong bond of up bringing

Benghazi Citizen said...

Ph:thank you dear friend for the wishes..100 years,huh???interesting..hopefuly i will be able at least to stand by then:)..Thank you again.
----------------------------------
K.H: Hello dear friend..You areabsolutely right..It should be considered mother's day:)..
Well,,i loved the suggestion of taking a day for my self,unfortunately ,having a demanding job,most of my time i'm doing one thing or another at work or for work..Sigh...perhapse soon..
and ,P.S :No I don't hate my only Michigan fan,,that wouldnt be smart..lol..
see you soon
-----------------------------------
Anglo-libyan:Thank you indeed for the wishes and the prayer..May Allah be kind to us all and bring us happiness and serinity..Bless you and your family..
----------------------------------
Enlightened spirit: So ,you do have an objection?lol i will forward your objection to my parents...
Seriously ,I'm flattered ..You actually read the whole thing ,and you found it interesting enough to consider replying specific lines of it..
Actually ,knowing how much busy you are these days preparing for the trip of you life ,i have to say i'm actually over whelmed and i feel a great deal of gratitude..
Thank you for finding my words good enough to make time reading them and discuss them..
Best of luck with what ever surprises(good ones inshallah) that are hidden in you bright future..
Best wishes and regards
p.s: well,,about the T,,emabaressing enough ,the key board i used to type down the post was busted..I fixed the letter now ,,if you read it again ,there is a big improvement..lol
-----------------------------------
abdullah sh: (Now ur life counter decrease one yr )
thank you for the reminder bro,lol...yeah ,i better start thinking of doing some thing with my life very soon...
Thank you again
best of luck..
-----------------------------------

ibeebarbie:what can i say?? i am really really thankful that you have such a good opinion about me,...I swear i wish i deserve the half of it...I'm speechless..Thank you again...I really don't know what to say except for:thanks dear friend ,that is really really nice of you..
May Allah Almighty bless you and your little charming princess and your great parents..
Best regards and wishes
-----------------------------------
حنان شلبي: شكرا ياصديقتي العزيزة,,أتمنى أيضا كل السعادة و التوفيق في حياة زاخرة بالنجاحات على المستوى الشخصي و العملي
تحياتي
-----------------------------------
Weda: thank yoou dear friend ,,we are really honoured to have such a good hearted young friend amongst us..you are right ,my mother is a wonderful,great lady...i do adore her..
so,you are a leo? i do wish that you don't have my bad temper which i believe came with me being a Leo..lol
Thank you again.
-----------------------------------
Khalid: hello there dear friend..Be advised that you are truly and deeply missed..
Thank you for the wishes...I wish you happiness and success as well...
Keep on checking on us..
see you
----------------------------------
Gheriani: thank you dear Gheriani for the nice words..I wish you and your family the best of ever thing..May Allah grant you all happiness and serinity..
Thank you.
-----------------------------------
crowded mind: yeah,,this time it is not a false alarm..
Thank you very much for the wishes and the nice words..
Keep in touch
thanks
-----------------------------------
D.TD: Behold ,,,it's the Groom him self...
Thank you for finding the time to stop by my friend..Thank you for the wishes and the nice words...
So,how was the wedding??:) I hope every thing went just as planned or even better..
Best regards

ASMA said...

oh happy birth day ...i wish the best 4 the best ..

Benghazi Citizen said...

asma:Thank you for the nice words..wish you the best to..May Allah makes all your dreams come true..
best regards

dr.butterfly said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
though it may be late, but better late then never huh?!?

i have to say.. your words were amaizing, i really enjoyed reading every word of every line. i would finish one scentence just to jump to read the other, with the look of admire on my face. it's nice to think of your day of birth that way!! where ever you spend your birthday, it's wat you think of it not what/where it was!!

"I realized that there is a difference between what i am ,and what i want to be ,but i am the result of both.." ...i have to say all your words touched me, but when i got to this phrase, i felt it was so true and i guess i can say the same about myself!!.. so no, i'm sorry you weren't just talking about you in your post..:)

life is a school we are the students, we learn but never enough!!... the most important lesson you must know is, that you must learn. and to see that you think of life in that way (that your mind is opend to change) that is the best thing you can come out with from life!!

i wish you more experince in your journey, i wish you more light to see your way, i wish you more smiles to ease the pain of your rainy days... but above all i wish that allah gides your way!!...

you are an amaizing person with wonderfull thoughts, take care, wa allah yahfthak min kool sooa!!

salam.. :)

Benghazi Citizen said...

Dr.butterfly
Wow..is that me you are talking about? I really appreciate what you think of me..I just wish i deserve it..
I like what you said about how life is a school.It really is.
Well,,thank you for the kind words ,and thank you for all the wishes..
I wish you best of luck ,too. May Allah grant you happiness and well being..
best regards

dr.butterfly said...

hey there BC..!
ofcourse i'm talking about you... and i'm sure you deserve it!!

best of luck, salam!!

د.محمود عبدالخالق said...

ربي يكبرك في طاعته و يحفظك لهلك وناسك و أحبابكَ
ويوفقك في دراستك وحياتك

Anonymous said...

I know it's late, but Happy Birthday !!!
From:
Melissa

ASMA said...

RAMADAN KAREEM ..
SAHA FTOREK

LoveLyH said...

بالطرابلسي خلي نقوللكم
رمضانكم مسعود ومبروك

Benghazi Citizen said...

Dr.Butterfly: thank you again..and Ramadan Mubarak.
-----------------------------------
Melissa ,asma ,lovelyh: Thank you indeed...bless you all..
Best Regards